Ahh, you again Scoonie. What do you want?
Nothing, just to tell you I have sold all my RPM Holdings, you know the listed automotive group roll up, ASX:RPM. Got out with a small profit of about 6%, only in there about a month!
What makes you think I give a rats what you did?
Well, I just thought you might like to know.
As I see it you should never have bought it, you dickhead. What person in his right mind would buy a heavily leveraged roll up retail stock in a period of rising interest rates and a weakening economy? The guys who run it look to be a bunch of miscreants as well. Outside of Wesfarmers next to none of the retailers has reported any good in the last 9 months. What makes you think RPM would be any different?
Well, you know I did a lot of research on it. Spent of lot of time reading up on the company and the industry.
You think you did research. Most of what you did was just gathering up what RPM management had told dicks like you, and then you found some further circumstantial evidence. Now I am not saying that is not useful, you have to start somewhere. However how do you know about what is really going on with that business? You may as well been pushing buttons and eating the free peanuts at the local VIP lounge.
Yeah, well you are going to look pretty stupid if they report well on the 26th of this month!
No. Whatever RPM reports it does not detract a crumb from what I am saying.
Yeah well, I made money out of it.
What you did was get in the car with Ivan Milat. Worse than that, you recognised the droopy moustache and the pools of blackness that were his pupils - and you climbed in anyway.
And now you are running around saying how smart you are. Why’d you get in the car in the first place? And think about this, you could have just as easily taken a little more time and walked to where you wanted to go. There was just no good reason to get in the car! Scoonie old cock, you really do have a problem.
Well just to correct you there, I’m not saying how smart I am. I’m just saying I sold it. But I wonder why I keep buying rubbish stocks. Do you think it is because I am part Irish, you know I have got a lot of Irish Catholic in me, and you know how they like to gamble. I like to punt too. Maybe that is it?
No. You are just an impulsive f#&kwit. Don’t try to blame your dead ancestors. That’s just as stupid as blaming your live ones. You did it, you are culpable. No one else.
Well is there anything I can do about it?
It is not as though you are alone. Humans almost became extinct about 900,000 years ago and got down to less than a couple of thousand. So whatever is in you is in everyone else, be it Irish, Indian, Japanese or Eskimo. We all have an unalterable genetic make up. We all have a nose, ears eyes, arms and legs and the characteristics of these then just express themselves differently in all of us. It is the same, though less obvious with our minds and emotions.
There must be something that can be done?
Well you talk of the Irish. Remember that Irish uncle of your mothers?
Uncle George! I really liked him. Humorous bastard. Told funny stories all the time. I loved that man!
Yeah, irresponsible George. Well remember how his Mrs handled the situation. She took hold of the money coming into the household and gave him an allowance. That way she limited the damage her wayward husband could do. Maybe when it comes to investing you need to do the same with yourself, give yourself a small separate investing allowance. You might want to give it a name, like: “Dickhead Fund”.
Thanks. Thanks, it’s been tough in parts hearing all this, but thanks. You know I think this has all helped me a lot. Can we talk again soon?
F#&ken hope not. I’ve got better things to do, now piss off.